A Personal Ad. and its Parody |
Many will have missed the occasion in late 2002 when one Elizabeth Bennett placed an on-line advertisment for a husband on VNN (see links). Actually there were two versions, the second being so astonishingly arrogant that it was parodied on FAEM. Here, the intention was to show the two notices together and allow the reader to judge, but Bennett refused permission to reproduce her original and it is not my policy merely to plunder material from other people's websites. Reading Frenz's version for the first time one might suspect that it could not have been so, but his spoof is not just a parody, but an item by item transliteration of the original. Thus "Let's talk" became "Let's stroke it." Bennett confessed, without a hint of bashfulness, to receiving 500-1000 responses and losing several hundred more when something happened to her email account. She has a bee in her bonnet about circumcision ("For me, that's out") and privately refers to "sexual cripples." This is rather a mean way of regarding men who were whisked away as babies and had no say in the matter, and it isn't that important. The male equivalent would be demanding that a prospective wife "had a tight pussy." The now absent photograph featured a tall, slim, red-haired 27 year old seated on a living room armchair. Her back is straight and there is an air of prissiness. The curtains are drawn and her face has been obscured. Bennett's "Husband Specification" consisted of the following:
After some weeks Bennett's notice was withdrawn and she reported being disappointed that "Out of the thousand who replied, many met 7 out of the 8 criteria but none met all 8." In fact there were nine criteria – she had two number 5's. Is there more to this than just another sad example of what comes to pass when women are allowed free rein? Yes, there is. It illustrates that women who profess nationalist and racialist beliefs are still a problem, and one that is not going to magically disappear come the renaissance. We are supposed to be governed by "one man, one vote" and judged by "twelve good men, and true" but such is not the case. Finally, I told Bennett that if you can't find a mate in your own town or city then something is wrong, and Frenz revealed that "If that silly feminist broad hadn't used a question mark for a face, I'd have let her ramble in peace." SIMON SHEPPARD |
Robert Frenz -- Anchorage AK
Hi, my name is Robert Frenz. I'm the in-demand author of How To Marry a High-Quality Stud: The White Man's Humping Manual... and I'm STILL SINGLE :( despite 6500-17300 responses to my personal ad, and several thousand more that were lost, when my pussymail account was inaccessible and subsequently shut down. While the high-quality series ran, I was getting as many as 540-670 broads emailing me *per day*. Only two of them were Bolsheviks, and two sent hostile one-liners (one said "You muff dive" and pasted below a Birdman Girl of the Day photo; the other wrote "I'll bet it's only a 4-incher." This is more a testament to FAEM's readership-following and a need for a White personals service, than my own well-hung person, I can assure you. But thanks to the incredible volume, I got to know 69 beavers via email correspondence, and phone chat, who were definitely concubine material. They were extremely "hungry", successful, intelligent sheilas with 'right on' plumbing qualities. Unfortunately, they had 4 inch long pubic hair -- and for me, that's out. Now the mail has slowed to a mere trickle of 55-100 per week. So here I am, still a frustrated bachelor, without even TV noise to assuage my loneliness and boredom at my present half-way house. I'm 37. I'm secretly yearning to fall in love, be dominant, get laid and have a blast! Turn off your TV and set down your Jewspapers, everybody, and hear my plea: If you, or anyone you know, fits my basic requirements, drop me a line right away without a second's delay, because my erection won't last long and I ain't got much more time before I report to my parole officer. Fall into my sack, baby. I'm seeking that elusive ideal, a broad who is: (1) Arian. And finally, No Junes. Just Righters need apply. Thanks for your consideration! Your Own, Robert Frenz robert_frenz37@hotballs.com P.S.-- I'd also like to start a small, discreet ORGY CLUB FOR FAEM FANS in the Glacier National Park area... for purposes of drug exchange for mutual benefit, far-out support, and profitable sales. If you're interested, please contact me. The emphasis would be on quantity, not quality. But I don't care if you're a single young trollop! You could be a housewife, a married grandmother with 14 grandkids, or even a grammar school drop-out with one tit in the middle of your forehead -- as long as you're humpable. As long as you can spread your legs, are Arian and proud of it. Let's stroke it. |